The rain.

I don’t know what’s real anymore.

Because you took something good and made it unrecognisable

Made it broken

Made it a lie Read more


Fall Apart.

Can I fall apart?

Like for a second can I not be strong?

For a minute can I just.


Could I let myself drop?

Smack, face down into the ground

And not pick myself up

Would that be so bad?

To fall apart.

I just kinda need to fall apart

To say everything by saying nothing

To sit in silent safety until I’m ready,








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What mummy doesn’t know.

I told myself that what mummy doesn’t know won’t hurt her. That the loubs on her feet will be enough and won’t desert her even if I did. Though I weren’t there when she needed me and now I see that she needed me, I needed the streets because we needed to eat and me not being home just wasn’t that deep. And I was deep in it, and deeping it, it weren’t good for me. But I wasn’t doing this for me I was doing this for them, dreams at age 10 of being in the prem but life took out the R and I fucked around and nearly caught an M so life threw in an N and I landed in pen, and if I knew then what I knew now? Shit. Read more

Do happy people exist?

Do happy people exist ?
People who smile from their hearts, not through grit
People who aren’t split
In two
At the thought of another day
People who don’t crave attention but reject it when they deem the conversation, negative
X Negative, makes for positivity
But how many times must the negative multiply till I’m okay. How much more negativity can I take.


Argumentative. Outspoken. And unapologetically Jaydee.